Feeling a bit down

The last fortnight or so has felt a bit weird in my head, mostly because I've got some virus or other that started out as a flu-ey/cold type thing that had me taking three days off work last week but has since lingered and continues to linger as a kind of congestion in my head.

My nose is blocked up for random parts of the day. I feel really hot in my head and randomly feel truly knackered but particularly at the end of the day.

It's a horrible feeling and I'd like it to go away now please.

I went for a nice walk in the park after work on Monday with the other half and felt truly dodgy afterwards. My eyelids started fluttering at one point, which apparently can mean that I was about to faint, but after a little rest I felt well enough to go out shopping. It's bloody annoying though as I hate feeling ill.

I'm avoiding going to the doctor too as all he ever does is give me antibiotics, which I'm trying not to get into an annual dependency cycle with.

So I'm trying to slug it out with whatever it is. Sometimes I feel that I'm getting better but at other times I'm back to feeling truly crap. I'll give it a few more days though before I resort to visiting my friendly neighbourhood antibiotic-dishing-out GP.

Last Saturday was the fifth anniversary of my mum's death, so I went along to the cemetery to clean up the grave, visit my dad's grave (located in another, older part of the place) and pay my respects. Not feeling brilliant, I took my time and it was a nice day to do so.

My mum's grave is located under a tree and right next to the Grand Union canal. So the sun shone, birds twittered and canal boats chugged past from time-to-time. It was a lovely, peaceful day.

And then "they" turned up.

I could hear the sound of drum-and-bass in the distance, getting closer.My mum's grave is on a newer elevated section of the cemetery where you have to take a few steps up to get onto the higher level of the newer plots. A car pulled up by the steps about 10 metres away from where I was. I ignored it initially but the sound of two "hoodies" coming out rapping along to their music was a distraction.

"Each to their own", I thought but kept an eye on them nonetheless.

Kensal Green isn't the nicest of area at the best of times and I was the only person in this section of the cemetery, so I was naturally wary. They sauntered around a bit by one of the graves at the end of the section and then sat on a fence and started drinking what looked like Corona or Sol and smoking something that was definitely not tobacco. *sigh*

I carried on working on my mum's grave pulling out the grass that had grown with a vengeance around the edges in the last three weeks, but the tranquility of the surroundings was somewhat spoiled. I wanted to ask them to turn the music down but definitely didn't feel safe enough to do that aimed with just my gardening fork!

They eventually left after about half an hour but I just thought of all the people there seem to be nowadays that don't give too figs about anyone other than themselves.

I told a guy off on the tube the other day for throwing away the bag that he had just eaten his pasty in onto the floor of the tube right in front of me.

• "Why did you do that?" I asked him.
• "I'll pick it up when I get off", he replied.
• "I bet that you don't", I countered and I know that I was right.
  

Then there I was sat on the bus on the way home when two guys decided that now would be a good time to listen to all the "tinny" tunes on their mobile.

"It's a free country", was their argument.

"Not if you impose yourselves on others", I tried to argue back but they weren't interested.

DOES ANYBODY CARE ANYMORE?