Through The Keyhole

Things looked up today. I really thought that my six weeks of having no land-line and a dead TiVo would be over.

Over the phone, the NTL engineer sounded like a Londoner and not the same muppet that rolled his Rs that came twice before.

And, he sounded like he knew what he was talking about.

And most importantly of all, when he turned up, he had a standard set of keys to get into the ground floor cupboards at my flats where the phone lines are connected up!

I looked at the keys as he took them out of the back of his van.

They were long and made of shiny steel with lots of complicated bits at the end. I'd waited so long to meet these keys. I almost loved those keys. My heart was a flutter...

He tried the first key. No joy. Then the next, it wouldn't even fit the key hole. And then the next until there was only one left. Anxiety gripped me by the throat and throttled away my last vestige of hope as the key was tried and failed to fit the lock.

He looked genuinely surprised! He tried the cupboard next to it where the electric meters for all the flats are stored. Opened first try! WHAT! What's going on here?!!!

He peered down at the keyhole.
- "Someone's been tampering with this. Look. You can see that the screws around the hole don't match."

Sure enough. Someone had changed the frigging lock!

So twice someone has turned up with no keys, then nobody turned up at all on my third attempt to get an engineer out and now, someone with the correct set of keys can't even get into the cupboard 'cause someone has changed the #!'*ing lock!

I think that I'll go off somewhere now and cry....... :o(